It’s almost over folks!
One more week and it will all be over for another little while.
All I can say is, “Thank fuck for that!”


Admirable’s Division 1 Predictions

“How am I going to spending my precious time now I don’t have predictions to write?” you ask. Ireland + December = Constant Inebriation!

Destination Unknown vs. Snowrollers

“Not the most exciting of fixtures to start off this week’s predictions” I think to myself as I stroke my imaginary beard and ponder over a week of action from the ENSL.

Destination Unknown make a welcome return this week with a flourish of activity in these final days of the season. This pleases me greatly and I am glad they did the right thing and came back to Finnish what they had started. However, the roster was looking a little anorexic with various levels of inactivity so C-mies returns to the line-up to provide some nourishment from the Command Chair, allowing zh to roam free and exercise his trigger finger. It’s not entirely clear yet if the Juhanator is more valuable in the field, but a little of C-mies inexperience was apparent during the replay verus Flatline-Ns this week when a promising looking Marine Round was cut short by a poorly dealt with base rush. Setting these concerns to one side I expect to see Destination Unknown picking up the slack, tightening things up and finishing out the season on a high note with a victory here.

I have a lot of respect for Snowrollers, easily one of the most punctual teams this season; they managed to have all fixtures played within the allotted time. Everyone one else take note! Regrettably good time keeping doesn’t necessarily win matches, but next season my introduce measures to reward punctuality. The Swede Squad had Flatline-Ns on the ropes in their fixture last week, although the 4-0 scoreline might not reflect this anyone who watch the game would have noted how poorly the Germans played. Snowrollers had some quality map control as Alien, relentlessly hunting down RTs, but they failed to pressure hive locations and gave the Deutsche too much time to compose themselves. I think Snowrollers realise they had several chances to claim a draw; this coupled with the previous weeks’ result versus Team Russia should provide them with enough confidence to take a round from the recently hibernating DU.eu.

Impact players:
DU.eu - : Apo (Marine), zh (Fade), Scl (Pew Pew! Flap Flap!)
sR | : Taurus (Brains), rabbit (Brawn), Danny (Beauty)

Destination Unknown 3 - 1 Snowrollers

Adz’ Final Thought: This could be more exciting that I thought! Damn, I write some good shit :D


saunamen vs. Team Russia

The underachieving Finnish hitmen faceoff against the unhittable Russian overachievers; the fourth place battle continues here for your viewing pleasure!

It seems to be anyone’s guess as to whether saunamen will be able to fulfil their obligations as the season draws to a close. With several fixtures outstanding, a leader\commander currently deposed by his Military commitments and only a few days of the season remaining, it doesn’t look promising. Resultantly Citrus has parted ways with his sauna-loving brethren to go a play with another bunch of Finns; Sharpi’s merry bunch of Division 1 Division 2 idlers, N+1 Famous Alien Landing Pads. It’s going to be up to NsN and Zakj as the two most active players to carry saunamen through this fixture, although the M.I.A. status of Peacham suggests that this game might not even happen. I offer my services as a Merc Comm here and now, but I warn you my Finnish vocabulary doesn’t extend beyond vittu, perkele and kossu!

I had an inkling last week that Team Russia might be able to beat Quaxy Gayming, but alas they couldn’t muster up anything close. Two sloppy Marine Rounds guaranteed a tied game and I can imagine something similar unfolding here. As always Team Russia’s prospects lie with how Macpersil fares in the field, his hyper-aggressive lerking usually tends to have very polarised results; he either dominates or gets dominated. Whilst saunamen might be lacking in activity and organisation, one thing they have in spades is ability. Team Russia will need to keep this in mind if they want to claim a few rounds or they might just get steamrolled by whichever Finn is on form on the day. It is worth noting comrade Top has returned to the Team Russia roster, he can be sporadically good and shouldn’t be underestimated.

Impact players:
saunamen - : NsN (Fade/Marine), Zakj (Marine), Admirable (lulz!)
.ru : Macpersil (Marine/Lerk), Joe Black (Marine), Snake (Turkmenistan Power!)

saunamen 2 - 2 Team Russia

Adz’ Final Thought: If it gets played, probably a draw. How boring!


Quaxy Gayming vs. CRAB BATTLE!!!

I know for a fact this is the one game that everyone has been waiting for this season. The two colossuses of the European competitive scene going at it in a no holds barred fight to the death!

The awesome Quaxy Gayming are fighting saunamen and Team Russia for the elusive fourth place. This might giving them a shot at the overall ENSL Title if Scale’s suggested four team playoff is implemented, but those spineless Sproggalots and cowardly Flatliners want to take this opportunity away. Even the dog in the street knows that Quaxy would annihilate these two wannabe champions, which must be why they are running scared. Seriously though, Quaxy are a decent side and have the capabilities to secure a win here against the last-place Crabs. The well documented details Nova’s affinity for sieges and the design of ns_lucid allude to a possible game breaker for the Finns, but some formidable skills from Talis, Kuitmo and Vartija suggests they have more than one ace up their sleeve.

It seems too that CRAB BATTLE!!! have been sharpening their massive claws in preparation for this monumental showdown. Although they currently languishing at the bottom of the table their stance is positive one; with bp providing more than his fair share of the laughs. I imagine the Crabs are very aware that this is a fixture they could win if they set their minds to it, and Quaxy will be thinking the same thing too. Although with Fades and Lerks getting flashed left, right and centre in recent matches and PCWs I cannot guarantee anything. If Nirgal’s alcohol-induced “shakey hands” returns the Crabs might be out of luck. CRAB BATTLE!!! managed to exhibit enough finesse last week to take a round from Destination Unknown, so with a bit of grit and determination they could just win this one.


Impact players:
Quaxy - : Nova (Lolicom!), Kuitmo (No Reg!), Vartija (Ninja!)
CRAB BATTLE!!! : Meyfarth (Lerk), GuiZ (Marine), Admirable (Best Player in NS?)

Quaxy Gayming 2 - 2 CRAB BATTLE!!!

Adz’ Final Thought: IT’S A TRAP!


Flatline-Ns vs. The Sproggalots

This is turning out to be a bit of an anticlimactic final chapter to this week’s predictions, what with everyone so excited about the Quaxy Gayming\CRAB BATTLE!!! match I’d be surprised if anyone wanted to see this old tripe!

In the Schwarz, Rot and Gold corner we have the heavy weight champions of the world, Flatline-Ns. This team has come far over the last few seasons, from also-ran to favourites for the ENSL Title. Many naysayers (read: trolls) in the NS Community will tell you these two teams are only the best now because all the other good players have gone. To these people I would extend my middle finger if I weren’t so polite. Anyone who tries to discredit the eventual victors on such grounds is just bitter. Yeah, so anyway, Flatline-Ns are the dominant force at the minute, with The Sproggalots in a very close second. The German line-up is actually quite inconsistent compared to Sproggas with a few inactive players and random editions. But when it comes down to it I feel that Flatline’s best six could beat Sprogga’s most of the time. If the German War Machine’s unholy trinity (Morvie, HiVeFiSh and phil) are playing and fighting fit I would expect them to win out here.

After last week’s song and dance things are predictably enough back to normal at The Sproggalots’ base of operations. Both GreeN and Sheep have been re-enlisted although I might be so cheeky as to point out they are technically ineligible for this game, so if Flatline-Ns were feeling a little bureaucratic… Aha! I’ll just plant that seed and see if a drama tree sprouts forth! These guys are badass disco-ninja-robots here to kick ass and take names. If anyone is going to challenge the Germans it’s gonna be The Sproggalots. Their roster is as tight as a nun’s genitalia. On good day they could beat Flatline and have done so in practise, but when it’s match time and everyone is watching I suspect one or two players might succumb to nerves. People will laugh this off like it’s only a computer game, but when you’re in that situation strange things happen, especially if you aren’t used to the pressure. Keep it cool!

Impact players:
~flatline-ns` : Morvie (Shotgun/Fade), phil (Skulk/Marine), HiVeFiSh (Fade/Marine/Comm)
sprogga ~ : GibbZ (Fade), Sheep (Lerk), Zamma (Marine)

Flatline-Ns 3 - 1 The Sproggalots

Adz’ Final Thought: I was tempted to go for the draw but I revel in controversy! This is just Round 1 anyway, Finals next week!


Ciao for now ;)